And There It Goes

Some things just are not meant to be. Sometimes you have to be vague. Some days it's better to just stay in bed, turn off your phone, and wait until tomorrow.

I could have done without today but it had to happen. That's just the way days are.

My throat is sore from screaming. So, pretend this is a whisper a whisper. pretend.

now. can you still hear me? okay. Today I lost a friend. No one died, that is not what I mean, but my actions caused someone to vacate from my life most likely forever. It's too bad. He is a good guy. A great one to have in your corner. You know what? I would not do anything differently. I am tired of explaining every step I take. This unfortunate incident which went down today had been in the works for years. No one listened to a word I said. No one thought I was correct. They still don't. Well, the ones who know they are wrong know I am correct but they are going to stick to their guns. They have nothing to lose, really. You see, in the end, I am the only one who really loses anything. But that is okay because these other people won't take from me anymore. It is a tiny victory that means nothing. Still, it sucks that I had to lose a friend. He'll understand someday. Or he won't. It is important that I don't worry about those things that are beyond my control. That is the stuff that makes me nuts. Nobody likes to feel like they are hated and that is how I feel but all I did was stick up for myself. I have to do that more often. No one expects me to. That is what made these other people mad. They got used to pushing me around. Then, one day, today, I wouldn't budge. They called me names. But I am okay. I won't get what I deserve but I did not expect to. It is not a win. Life is not about winning because it is not a game. Do you understand?